2. Navigating burnout - an expert unpacks my personal experience

Seasoned psychotherapist Dr. John Mlinarcik joins me for a deep dive into an experience that is far more common than most people realize: burnout.

In our conversation, I share my personal journey, going beyond surface-level descriptions and commentary to offer a raw, honest look at what it actually feels like to go through it - and Dr. John unpacks my story to discuss the signs, symptoms, and solutions to this widespread issue.

In this post, I highlight 3 topics from our discussion - but there’s plenty more to hear in the episode. I hope you’ll check it out. ​Spotify​ | ​Apple Podcasts​ | Inline player below ⬇️​

👉 Burnout is an incredibly common experience

Burnout affects a lot of people. If you are in the throes of it right now, or if you have ever been through it - you are actually in the majority of working professionals. In 2018, Deloitte reported that 77% of workers had experienced burnout in their current job, and 51% had experienced it at least once before. In 2024, BCG reported 48% of workers were currently burned out.

When I first experienced burnout, I felt so incredibly lost. And alone. But because I only had 3 people with whom I felt safe discussing what was really going on - my husband, my coach, and a brand new therapist - it led to secondary feelings of isolation, shame and hopelessness. All of this made the experience far worse than it had to be.

But when I did finally talk about my experience with my closest friends and colleagues, I was shocked to hear from almost every single one of them that they had actually gone through burnout, too. They’d just never told anyone outside of their “safe zone” about it.

In case you need more data to convince you it's a problem, Dr. John shares several tidbits in the episode:

• Burnout is estimated to be a factor in 20-50% of job departures.

• The cost of treating burnout is enormous - it is estimated to be $125-$190 billion annually in US alone.

• Burnout treatment accounts for 8% of the US’ annual spend on healthcare.

This is my very long-winded way of telling you, if you are experiencing burnout now, or if you’ve gone through it before, you are not alone. In fact, you’re far from it. I hope this episode can help you make sense of the experience - and help you see a path forward.

👉 What is burnout?

In the episode, Dr. John describes burnout in two ways. He begins with a literal definition, which is "a reduction of fuel or substance that's burned down to either nothing or limited."

🚗 For a car, it’s an empty tank.

🪵 For a piece of wood, it has burned through completely and turned to ash.

From a mental health standpoint, burnout is a syndrome that consists of physical and mental symptoms across three dimensions. Collectively, these lead to a person feeling like they’re “running on empty.” To be diagnosed, a person must be in a state of distress across all three.

1. 🫠

Extreme exhaustion

Exhaustion affects your physical, mental, and emotional health. The primary causes are prolonged periods of work-related stress and overwork, which happens when (1) your manager assigns too much work, (2) the workplace itself is prone to high levels of stress, or (3) you take on too much work yourself due to especially high levels of concern for others or perfectionistic tendencies.

2. 💔

Cynicism & disconnection

Cynicism shows up as being overly critical about your coworkers, the work you're expected to do, or the company your work for. This mindset commonly leads to feelings of detachment and disconnection, which then tends to exacerbate itself. Dr. John highlights this vividly - “You feel alone, and then you feel alone alone.”

3. 📉

Ineffectiveness at work

Burnout is an “occupational disorder.” So, by definition, one of the core symptoms is it affects your ability to do your job. This often starts out as belief or worry that you aren't doing a good job or "enough," which eventually becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy as it reinforces negative thoughts, actions and behaviors. The end result? Your work actually gets worse.

In the episode, I share many examples where these signs showed up in my life. Make sure you bring the popcorn and PLENTY of butter for this episode... 🍿+ 🧈🧈🧈

👉 How to recover from burnout

There is no surefire way to guarantee you won’t hit a state of burnout. It is always possible that circumstances outside your control will tip the scales - especially if you are a "doer," a perfectionist, or you're especially concerned about taking care of everyone around you.

But there are things you can do to improve your health, your connections with others, and your work situation that can drastically change how you experience your day-to-day life. These are the things that will ultimately help you recover from burnout, and could even help you avoid it in the first place.

1. 🛌

Take care of your body

Prioritize sleep, exercise regularly, and eat as sensibly as you can. For me, this is the most crucial step - by a landslide. If I don't prioritize my physical health, my brain can only do so much.

2. 🧑‍⚕️

Engage a therapist or coach

If you can find or pay for services from a therapist or a life or career coach, I highly encourage it - especially if you believe you are in or nearing a state of burnout. Regular support and guidance from a professional can truly change your life.

3. 🧑‍🤝‍🧑

Invest in your community

Humans are social creatures. Connection is core to health and survival. The only way to counteract the second symptom of burnout (disconnection) is to develop and heal your relationships with others, and through social engagement - at home and at work.

4. 🎨

Prioritize “me” time

Schedule time to do activities you enjoy. Then, ruthlessly prioritize making them happen. Leave the office, turn off your phone, and focus on the moment. This is the proactive approach to counteract the first symptom of burnout (overwork and exhaustion), by reclaiming time outside of the office and finding energy and joy.

5. 📋

Realign work expectations

Do notify your boss that you need relief immediately. But wait for a deeper discussion to address your issues head-on and request changes. A meeting will go much better if you've recovered a bit first - you'll be able to think more clearly, and you're less likely to get emotional or adversarial. Although if that happens? It's ok. ❤️

6. 🦋

Does your job work for you?

If, after all these steps, you are still struggling in your job, consider a bigger change. If you can't align on realistic expectations, your work environment is toxic or inherently stressful, or it's draining for other reasons, a change of scenery may be what you need. This could look like a new role, a new team, or maybe a new employer altogether.

I outlined these steps in a very intentional sequence. The first 4 generally align to ​Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs​, starting from the bottom of the pyramid, and moving up to the top. It's also the order I use myself, whenever I realize my reserves are dwindling and I need to refill my own gas tank.

👉 Some final thoughts

Burnout is real. It’s extraordinarily common. And it can be addressed. Being able to recognize the signs requires honesty and vulnerability - and while it may feel unbelievably difficult to accept that you're going through it, recognizing you need to take care of yourself is the first step.

If you are experiencing burnout now - or if you’ve been through it before - know that you are not alone. And you can make it to the other side. You've got this.

Listen to the full episode for the full story. Spotify | Apple | Inline player below ⬇️

💥 Break Out

PS - Please share this episode with anyone who you think would benefit from it. I created it - and really, this podcast - because my own experience navigating burnout was so lonely and painful. I've yet to see a "hero story" that chronicles someone else's journey, so I made my own. My hope is this will reach someone out there who really needs to hear it, and to know they're not alone.

👉 Listen to the full episode: